13 Classic Techniques to Catch a Cheater
Catching a cheater can be a difficult task. They’re sneaky, manipulative and seeing through the lies of a person you love isn’t always easy. If you have a gut feeling something’s going on, there’s a good chance there is. Honesty isn’t in the cheater’s manifesto and you need to fight fire with fire. These tried and tested techniques have busted cheaters for decades and they’re still rock solid go-to’s today.
Change of Plans
If your partner is cheating, changing plans will usually throw a spanner in the works for their own secret plans. Try telling them that you’ll be going away for the weekend to see your parents or to go to an event which they would hate to go to themselves. Make sure to give plenty of notice to allow them to make their own plans. Once the weekend away comes around, there are a couple of options to play the situation:
- Say that the plans didn’t work out and see if there is mad rush to cancel their secret plans
- Leave as planned for the weekend but come back early unannounced (night time would be best) and see if they come back with any special friends
Check the Alibi
Cheaters tend to lie about their whereabouts to cover up where they really are. Using alibis such as “I’m staying at a friend’s house” or “I’ll be late because of a business meeting” are fairly common. To test these alibis simply make a phone call under the pretense that you couldn’t reach their cell phone directly. If they said they’re working back late, call the office. If they said they’re staying at friend’s house, call that friend. You’ll want to make sure that you’ve prepared a half decent reason for needing to get in contact with them but using this technique will confirm their whereabouts. This isn’t something that you want to make a habit of but if you have strong suspicions give it a whirl.
Smart phones can be an absolute gold mine of evidence if you’re trying to bust a dishonest partner. Apart from face-to-face communication the majority of our interaction with other people is done on our phones. If your partner or spouse is sending text messages or making phone calls to someone they shouldn’t be, this is perfect place to find this kind of information. Check their messaging history and call history for clues that they may be cheating. Also read my guide on investigating a cheating partners phone for tips on where to find this data.
The Pop In
As Jerry Seinfeld once said “I hate the pop in”…and cheaters do too. Look for opportunities to make the odd surprise appearance at times when you believe they may be lying to you. If they’ve started working late a lot, drop by the office. If they told you they were going to be in a certain place, go there. Making these unannounced ‘pop ins’ will help confirm or deny your suspicions. There are a few excuses which you’ll want to use for your sudden appearance. These include that your phone was dead and couldn’t reach them, bring them something they forgot or even drop by with flowers or a gift as a sign of affection.
The Pocket Check
A lot of evidence of infidelity can be left behind or forgotten about in cheater’s pockets. These include things like restaurant or gift receipts, hand written phone numbers or even condoms. In the early stages of infidelity cheaters are paranoid and cover up their tracks. As the affair goes on, they become comfortable and forgetful which leads to mistakes and evidence being left behind. Covertly check your partner’s pants or jacket pockets from time to time or if you do their laundry this is a great opportunity also.
The spending habits of someone can be quite revealing. Follow the money as they say. If you have joint accounts with your partner or have access to their banking information it’s worth analyzing their transaction data. Have they been making suspicious hotel or restaurant purchases? Have large amounts of cash been taken out from ATMs and possibly stored elsewhere to hide where they are spending their money?
Reverse Image Search
If you’ve never hear of Google Reverse Image Search, you’re missing out. It was one of the main methods used on MTV’s Catfish to track down people using fake profiles on Facebook. This tool can also be used to search for other possible social networks that your partner may be secretly using.
To search your partner’s photos, simply visit Google Images and click on the small camera icon in the search bar. You’ll be prompted to upload the image and then Google will find where this image has been used elsewhere on the internet.
The Fake Profile
Setup a fake profile on Facebook using a profile picture of someone that you think is their type. You can use images from Google Image Search or copy them from another person’s social media account. Simply wait a few weeks (so the account doesn’t look too fresh) and then send a friend request to your partner. See if they take the bait and then slowly see if you can work your way into a date or meeting with them.
Another use of this fake profile would be to use it to create a Tinder account. If you suspect your partner may be using Tinder behind your back, this is a surefire way of finding out as there is a high chance their Tinder profile will appear in the mix due to your close proximity.
This may seem a little creepy but desperate times call for desperate measures. Following someone isn’t the easiest thing to do, especially when they know your face, clothes and car all too well. Be sure to disguise yourself and keep a fair distance. It also pays to have a prepared excuse if you do happen to get caught. Following your partner should really be a last resort and if in doubt, hire a professional!
GPS trackers are no longer out of reach for the general consumer and can be not only affordable but extremely easy to conceal. Trackers can be put in a car, bag or a purse. Use extreme caution when using these devices because if your partner finds it there’s no real credible excuse.
A cheaper alternative is to use your own phone as the tracking device. Simply setup Find my iPhone (for apple) or Android Device Manager (on Android). ‘Accidentally’ leave your phone (on silent) in your partner’s car and get a live reading of their current location.
Cameras can be hidden in anything these days. Some of the most ingenious I saw online were inside pens, USB sticks and even car keys. It’s also possible to buy just the miniature camera itself and then install it into any object. The video is stored on a micro storage device and can be viewed by plugging it into a computer. As these cameras have motion detection, you can leave the object containing the camera in the house and while you have a weekend away, see if the mice will play. The general pricing of these products is usually around $20 – $100 and you can read our buying guide for tips on the best hidden cameras.
Hidden audio records are a very affordable way to covertly record conversations when you’re not around. Similar to cameras, they are hidden in everyday items such as USB sticks and pens. Depending on the situation, you may want to leave the device under a seat in their car, around the house or hide it during a surprise office visit. Keep in mind that most of these recorders store the audio in the device and require being plugged into a computer for playback so make sure you can retrieve it later on!
If you don’t want to invest in a device, there are apps available for your existing smart phone. Simply hit record and leave your phone in the house while you’re not there or ‘accidentally’ in their car or office.
Hire a Private Investigator
If you don’t want to get your hands dirty, hire a professional. Private investigators will perform tasks such as surveillance, tracking and digital forensics. These services don’t come cheap and are usually priced around $100/hour. Keep in mind that assignments may end up costing around $500 and can go into the thousands and in some cases the hundreds of thousands.
NOTE: Check the current laws in your area before you engage in any of the above techniques. The writer and catchacheater.com take no responsibility for any actions taken from reading this article nor do they condone surveillance or accessing other peoples private data. This article is for educational purposes only.